prpl pen (prpl_pen) wrote,
prpl pen
prpl_pen

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So, in my last post I was talking about NaNoWriMo and I was all excited about that, and I still am, except things have changed and now I really can't decide if I should even bother with it. On the one hand, I do really want to and I think in a lot of ways it would be good for me. On the other hand, things are kind of Suck for me right now (don't really want to get into details, but...yeah) and I think I'd just be setting myself up for more needless stress. Basically, if I commit myself to starting, I know I am going to put pressure on myself to finish and not be a failure and stuff. This is just how I am. Honestly, when I did NaNoWriMo in 2004, I loved it and it was fantastic, but also a super stressful time for me. Seriously, by the last week of November, I had developed a constant nervous eye tic that didn't go away for weeks.

At the same time, I feel like I really need this. Ugh, indecisive. I guess for now the plan is to try and see how it goes, and if it's too much for me to handle, then to not beat myself up for not finishing. That is the tricky part. I guess a lot will depend on the next few days, when I find out if I've screwed myself over irreparably or not.

In other news, I suck at commenting still, and I am so sorry and I miss people and I just really need to try and be better at that. Ugh. I kind of feel like I shouldn't even be making an entry now because it is just coming across to me as "whine whine whine whine whine." Uhm. So...something not whiny. I drew a picture? Which everyone already saw because it was just in the entry before this one. Eheheh.

Also it's autumn, and it's the best time of year and everything smells like crisp leaves and harvest. If only it would last longer.
Tags: nanowrimo, real life, writing
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